I need Thee every hour.

  I have found very quickly that with out my Savior I am nothing, BUT with my Savior I can become everything.

 When I got my call to the New York Rochester Mission Hill Cumorah Visitor Center I had a mini panic attack about this. WHY? Because I have a fear of speaking in public.. Put me in a public speaking position and I am instant anxiety, barf... want to run away crying. So I knew that being here would not come easy.

 My first transfer here every tour made me want to cry. I would do all I could to pass the tours off to other sisters. I felt so inadequate to be here. I didn't understand why heavenly father called me to speak Spanish. in a visitor center. where i would be speaking to to groups of people each day. learning sooo many new things about Joseph Smith and the Historical sites. I found myself asking if "was this a mistake? Am I qualified to be here? What is going on!?" The answer is NO it was not a mistake, YES I am qualified to be here and my call was inspired by Heavenly Father.

  Day by day I would take a tour and I would still want to throw up, my mind would blank out, my hands would sweat and my tongue was in knots. I found myself very discouraged, I would leave a shift feeling really bad about myself as a missionary. I tried to get over this fear on my own, but day after day I didn't find it to be getting and easier. That is when I realized that I needed to let myself go, to humble myself and take it to my Heavenly Father, that it was only through him that I could be made stronger. so One night I knelt in prayer. I told my father in Heaven that I was struggling to get over my shyness, I felt I wasn't being the missionary He called me to be. I was here to strengthen the saints and I was hardly reaching that expectation.

 A few days went by and it wasn't getting better. I had dreams about bad tours it was haunting me every where. I didn't understand how to lead by the spirit when I was so full of fear. I then realized that I was not fully understanding to concept of faith in the atonement. Heavenly Father humbled me quick by having Brandon Flowers(the singer of the killers) coming in and my companion and I took him on tour. I knew that this would be the most intimidating tour I'd ever give to some one. We ended up singing "I need Thee every hour" and any one that knows me, I DON'T SING FOR ANYONE! ESPECIALLY Brandon Flowers. But I had no choice. My companion had already started.

  Heavenly Father knew that by me taking him on tour all of my fears would be swallowed up in one tour. After that day each tour grew easier and easier tour by tour I found myself learning to connect with each family that came in, in unique ways adapting to what they needed by listening carefully in my heart what the holy ghost was trying to tell me.

  Through this experience I have learned so much about how important it is to let the natural man go, to jump blindly into having faith in the Savior Jesus Christ and giving my weaknesses into him so that they can become strengths. I know that He is the reason I have battled and overcame this fear. With out Him it could have never been possible. I have had this fear since the beginning of my time here on earth. I was born shy and I thought I was going to die shy. I am still a woman of few facts one tours, but I have learned to love and connect with people as they come through, always with a prayer in my heart that heavenly father through the holy ghost will tell me what each person is in need of hearing. I never understood what Visitor Sister Center missionaries like myself do, I didn't understand the importance of my call. I feel so honored to be here, where the church was restored to help strengthen the members of this churchs' testimonies and to help them come closer to Christ.

  I am not the most eloquent of people, but I have learned quickly that eloquence isn't a requirement as long as I have sincerity and love. I have found these qualities to be important through the help of my savior. I am soooo thankful for my father in heaven, for my savior Jesus Christ and the power of the holy ghost for being here making me strong when I can't do it on my own. Lifting me up when I am on my knees, and building my confidence when it was at a low.

 I know that if we take our weaknesses and our fears to God that they can become strengths, they will put you through the refiners fire to shape us into who we need to be as better children of God. My tours are far from perfect, but I feel my self growing more each day.

 I appreciate and am so beyond grateful for this call. This opportunity to meet such beautiful amazing people. Often times at the end of the tours I find myself feeling like I am saying goodbye to a family member knowing that alot of these tours I probably wont see again in this life. I am indeed grateful though to be making so many new friends for the life to come and for all eternity.

 We don't need to be of many words to be qualified to serve. All we need is to know it's true, testify, trust in god, and the Spirit does the rest :)

https://www.lds.org/media-library/video/youth-curriculum-2013/05-may?lang=eng