Keeping your eye single to the glory of God.

Let’s get real here. Life is hard. Temptation is knocking at every door, waiting for us to open up and let weakness loose. We all pass through trials and we all have felt alone. Truth is. You are never alone. You have weaknesses as do I. Here is where I let go of who I was to become who I am and who I want to be. I am done running from my past, and coming up with excuses for myself. This is the time where I will stand up and face my future with hope, faith and an abiding trust in my Savior Jesus Christ. You do not have to face the future alone, and heal from the past by yourself.

We have been given great gifts from a God who loves us. He has given us the beautiful gift of agency, or the ability to choose right from wrong. 

 Sometimes... we use that agency in a way that would not be exactly pleasing to God. With agency comes accountability. The ability to own up to what we have done. Or in some cases not done. I once was a girl of many excuses. I had an excuse for anything "I didn't do that because..." "I am this way because..." "I was late because...." Yes our experiences make who we are. But we cannot make up excuses and let our past bind us. "The past can hurt... You either learn from it... or run from it" Don't give your past, or Satan that power to bind you down and drag you into misery. The past can be the greatest blessing or burden. Will it make you better or bitter? What will you have your past be?

We all have that...."I wish I would have done this differently moment."

I am about to share one.. that is embarrassing. and a little silly, however it taught me a VERY significant lesson.

I cannot believe I am doing this. But here we go. As missionaries we are not to date, flirt, or take part in ANYTHING romantic for the time we are dedicated to this service. So one beautiful spring evening at the beginning of my mission we were driving through this town, it's basically all farm land. As we are approaching this light there is a backup of traffic and as we all four looked around to see what was going on we saw that a trailer full of manure had tipped, my first instinct was to giggle and make some jokes, then as we all four missionaries must have seen the same thing at the same time the car got dead silent.... As we saw a man in a cowboy hat who was shirtless... scraping up this manure. As we all sat in silence and observed this situation the sister driving didn't realize the car in front of her had come to a stop... as she slammed on her breaks we luckily were able to stop before anything bad came of it. This was a reminder to me that I MUST NEVER LET MY GUARD DOWN. God gives us laws, and commandments to protect us. They are not to be broken. In this moment my Father in Heaven taught me a very valuable lesson that I will remember forever. God’s laws are to be followed as closely as humanly possible. I have learned the valuable lesson to let go of the natural man instincts and to follow Christ more closely. There is danger as we allow our mind to wander. Not even just a little. There is safety for the soul as we stay close to Christ.

"And now, my sons,(or daughters) remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall."
Heleman 5:12 

Growing up we sang a song in primary:

The wise man built his house upon the rock,

The wise man built his house upon the rock,

The wise man built his house upon the rock,

And the rains came tumbling down.

The rains came down, and the floods came up,

And the house on the rock stood still.

The foolish man built his house upon the sand,

The foolish man built his house upon the sand,

The foolish man built his house upon the sand,

And the rains came tumbling down.

The rains came down, and the floods came up,

And the house on the sand washed away.

Who will you be? 

As we build our foundation on Christ and keep our eye single to his commandments and follow the pathway home, our weaknesses will have no more power over us. Satan will come at you; he will hound you and do his best to beat you down. But because you are built on Jesus Christ HE CAN NOT BIND YOU. Do not give Satan an excuse to creep into your life!! He is one of those things that if you give him and inch he will take a mile.

"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."

Weaknesses can become strength. Only through Jesus Christ. We are given trials, and weakness to over come to make us soft, and workable in Christs hands. 

So how do we keep our eye single to God? How do we over come this?

READ YOUR SCRIPTURES. Daily. PRAY. Daily. Follow the commandments. GO TO CHURCH. 

God has given us sooo many great tools to become better. DO NOT let them go to waste. I promise you if you read from the book of Mormon every single day you will become a new creature through Christ. Your past will no longer hold you back, Christ will set you free for the future. 

 "And it came to pass that when I, Nephi, had spoken these words unto my brethren, they were angry with me. And it came to pass that they did lay their hands upon me, for behold, they were exceedingly wroth, and they did bind me with cords, for they sought to take away my life, that they might leave me in the wilderness to be devoured by wild beasts.

 But it came to pass that I prayed unto the Lord, saying: O Lord, according to my faith which is in thee, wilt thou deliver me from the hands of my brethren; yea, even give me strength that I may burst these bands with which I am bound."

1 Nephi 7 

Nephi teaches us something here. That when you are bound up by ANYTHING sin, grudges, hate, anger, temptations... rely on the Lord. Pray. Not for a change of situation, pray for the strength to over come it. 

"And Alma and his people did not raise their voices to the Lord their God, but did pour out their hearts to him; and he did know the thoughts of their hearts.

13 And it came to pass that the voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort, for I know of the covenant which ye have made unto me; and I will covenant with my people and deliver them out of bondage.

14 And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.

15 And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord. "

Mosiah 24 

No more excuses as to why you didn't do something :)  Face it and say "I didn't do it because I simply was scared." "I was late today because I was slow to get ready this morning, because... I was slow" "I didn't wake up to my alarm because I went to bed too late last night. Now I woke up late and will not be on time to work... I will be better tonight and tomorrow morning." As I have learned to accept my short comings and ask for help from my Savior Jesus Christ my past is losing power. It is no longer holding me ransom.

My I wish I would have moments are now stepping stones into the future. As I overcome each obstacle and face it with Jesus Christ my fears are lost in faith. My regrets turn into rejoicing as he surrounds me in his love through the enabling power of the atonement.

When I have that pushing feeling to talk to a person, assist them with loading their groceries, or feel the need to help them shovel their walk I will do my best to not hesitate. I will do my best to follow the promptings. I will step up and do my best to be an instrument in the hands of the lord.

Let Jesus Christ come in. He is the way. There is no other way. He came to earth and gave his life. He suffered all that you will suffer, and have suffered. He made it possible for you to be cleansed from sin. 

Take his hand and walk into the future with a new brightness of hope. Become a better version of you. No more looking back to what hurts, look forward to what heals, find what sets you free and fly. 

Keep your eye single to God and Christ will walk with you daily. Build your foundation on Christ and you will not fall. Surround yourself in good company. You are strong enough to move past what ever is holding you down. You are powerful enough to break the binds. Christ gives you strength when you feel you don't have enough. Trust in him and let him into you life. 

I AM HAPPY :)

"12 Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you.

 13 And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

 14 And I will be found of you, saith the Lord:"

 Jeremiah 29:13

My favorite scene from this video is after the man who is healed from being blind finds Christ and HE LEAPS into his arms and just collapses.

"I once was blind and now i see"

I have never been literally blind. However I have had my spiritual sight dimmed. Until I found Christ. 

I have found happiness in obedience. Not obedience because it is what others expect, but because it is what My father in Heaven hopes for and has commanded.

Growing up and even today there is nothing I love more than my mommy or daddy telling me they are proud of me. 

You know the feeling? When some one you look up to so much says "I am proud of you" and your heart sores through the sky because you are doing what is right!?

There are three men I love more than anything. 

1.Heavenly  Father

2.Jesus Christ

3.My earthly daddy

These men are incredibly influential in my life. 

There is a desire I have grown to thirst after and that is to make my Father in Heaven proud. I am learning to keep his laws, simply... because I love him. As I do so I know he is smiling upon me. I feel at peace in knowing that my life is in His hands and He will protect and guide me as long as I do what he says. 

I love my Savior Jesus Christ because he gave everything. He gave His life. All so that we could live. He knew we would be imperfect and break fathers laws. He came to earth and suffered all manner of afflictions for you and for me. He over came temptation, he lost His will and submitted to the fathers. He was born to give His life to serving sinners, to lifting the weary, to comforting the sick, and healing the afflicted. He is my big brother, and the example of who I wish to be like some day. To stop everything I am doing, and to ask heavenly father "What can i do for you today?" I wish to lose my will and make it become the fathers will. Just as my Savior Jesus Christ has. 

My daddy... I don't even know where to begin. I am His little viking. I have seen this man endure all pain possible, physical, emotional, stressed to all limits that most people would cave in. But not my daddy. He always tells me I can push through my trials because I am a viking. That stubborn viking blood had to come from some where. My daddy is the strongest earthly man I know. He has taught me about respect. Respect for others, respect for my self and what it means to serve. He would give anything to help a soul in need even if it was his last scrap to live from. He teaches me that when things get ugly and you want to give up... Push through. Get up and fight on. Never turn your back. and always fight. He loves my family with out limitations. Especially my mommy. He is the greatest gentlemen. He gives everything so that we can be protected, warm and safe. 

I have learned to see quite a parallel here on my mission between my earthly family and heavenly family. 

God gives us parents so that we can understand an INKLING of what he feels for us. 

He gives parents children to test their limits and push all buttons so that some day our love will be unconditional as His love for us is. 

He gives us parents who should and do give everything just as he did. He loves us and He gave us his son so that we could make it home to him. 

Just as my earthly daddy cheers me on and tells me "These too shall pass...(These being your kidney stones) My heavenly father says "This too shall pass, just keeping clinging to me and I will guide you through" My daddy encourages me in all that I do, and He warns me of danger and protects me from harm. Just as my heavenly father does. If we swallow our pride and humble ourselves to be led to safety our father in heaven is there.

Heavenly Father is there even if an earthly father cant be or chose not to be. He is there to protect and to watch over us. To love us and to be a refuge from the world.

I can not wait for the day I can collapse into my Father in Heavens arms and kiss his cheeks. To tell him thank you for all he has given me. Even my trials. For the gift of my testimony in knowing that He and His son are there. 

There will be a time when He calls us all home, it is my hope that I can stand before His face and hear him say with a tender smile on His face "Well done my good and faithful servant"

It is my desire to reach out to everyone, to give them the same strength I have found in Christ, to give others the same joy I have found through living correct gospel principles and commandments. There is safety in keeping Gods laws, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. 

I am happy because I know I am a daughter of God. Even though life is no where near perfect, or rarely if ever easy. I know that nothing we suffer through is in vain. To every lesson there is something to be learned. Through each trial we can be strengthened. 

I know that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. 

with God nothing shall be impossible. 

His arms are always open to you, he is reaching out for you and calling your name. He knows you. He wants to bring you peace, He wishes for you to be happy. 

His hands created the earth, they commanded the ocean to be still, they cause the day to be night and the night to be day, let his hands hold you. Let him heal you. Let Him give you happiness. 

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Philippians 4:13 

Learning to love

I am not one that waits for a New Year to set sooo many goals that I rarely ever accomplish one. However this year I will be setting one goal. This goal has been one I have wanted to reach for quite some time.

Today while I was studying I felt I needed to study a section of preach my gospel (a manual we as missionaries study from so that we can teach the doctrine clearly.) about obtaining Christ like attributes and I flipped open to charity.

Charity is something I have written about before. However today... My eyes were opened to something new.

This is my time to learn how to love.  Not as the world loves, as Christ loves.

Have you ever been hurt? Let down? Miss lead? Used? Have you ever had an irreplaceable friendship broken? Have you ever felt like it was impossible to give of your love again?

How are we supposed to keep giving our love to people who don't value it, that don't protect it?

I know that I eventually just lock everyone out and become hardened to such a great commandment. I have a tendency to push others away as I get close to them, to run before it's possible to be let down.

I don't know why I do this. I was raised in a home based on teachings of love and kindness. My home was a refuge growing up from the world around me.

I am me. Me is a socially awkward, do what I want when I want kind of girl. I enjoy my alone time, being in large group situations actually makes me want to vomit, my nickname when I was little was "re run" I found my favorite out fit and I wore it every day until it was no longer... wearable. I love animals more than I love being with people. My backyard is the mountains where most of my time is spent. Driving in the car alone is my favorite time to connect with my best friend; it’s my escape time to talk with my Savior as if He were sitting next to me. I have never felt alone in life because I always know Jesus Christ is with me.

Growing up I knew who I was. I knew what I wanted and NOTHING COULD STOP ME!

Then reality hit. And it hit hard. Going to school made it hard to be me. The me I wanted to be wasn't generally accepted as "normal" to others. I lost site that Me is who God wants me to be. I had many friends turn their backs on me, and lost the confidence in people that I once had. Love became so much different than what my childhood self-thought it should be. People tried to change me; I was broken down and lost. Life at times isn't always the happily ever after we see in fairy tales and sometimes is more like the part when belle and her horse Philippe get lost in the forest full of wolves. That scene is what my life became. I was surrounded by wolves that in my mind I felt sought after my destruction.

I lost who I once, that tender loving full of brightness, hope, and kindness to all little girl. I remember when I was little I had this wonderful friend Jordan Yates the two of us though we could make wings out of a bunch of stray bird feathers and sticks that we could fly. To us, nothing would get in the way of that... except for gravity. What about jumping off of play sets holding giant black trash bags? The wind would just HAVE to come catch the bag perfectly and carry us away right??? That is when the wind never came. What about umbrellas... we could jump off of the top bunk and float off to space right!?!?!? Again gravity and inside out umbrellas were our worst enemy. But in our bright imaginations these things could become reality... No matter what we were told, we knew we could accomplish taking flight.

Life got hard. I lost a lot of friends, to death, betrayal, graduation from high school moving on and many others things. My heart was getting more and more hard to open.

To many people wasted energy on trying to break their way in and to smash down my walls forcing me to change myself rather than finding an opening and helping me light the way.

My twentieth year is when things began it was a year full of a lot of change.... I found me some friends that I keep close. I made friendships that didn't last longer than a few months... and I finally realized my family is the ones who never leave and the ones I should cleave to. I started finding who I was again. I realized I needed Jesus Christ’s; He is the only one who can light the way. I realized I had a great need for the atonement but had not a clue how to use it. My twenty first years came when I decided that I was going to find myself in Christ... I pushed everything aside and I came on a mission. Where I have am becoming found.

The scriptures have taught me that with God nothing shall be impossible and that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I have connected the dots, and found healing through the Atonement.

Just a few days ago that I came to reality. I was sent to earth to be changed by God. Not to be changed by man. God loves me for all of my perfect imperfections. Every little bit of me he created. He knows how to restore my broken pieces to better than original. He knows how to fortify my foundation and to lift me when I am weak and not yet ready to stand on my own. His tender hand is here guiding me, showing me things I never knew were possible. He is teaching me who His son Jesus Christ is; He is teaching me of His love...

This is the place Christ is showing me how to love again.

Love is an action. Love isn't a passive feeling, when you love someone you do kind things for them. You don't just tell... you show. It is the greatest show and tell ever. You can love your mom, dad, brother, sister, pets friend any one you meet... BUT HOW!?

How do you let go of the fear that one might not love you in the same way you love them? How do we let go of the fear love will fade and let you down? How do you let go of all doubt and let love in??

The scriptures I am about to share changed my world. I have read them so many times before, the beautiful thing about scripture, they always say the same thing... however they reach you in different ways in different stages of life.

Here is the first set, these come from the Book of Mormon.

"46 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail—

47 But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.

48 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure. Amen."

Moroni 7

IF YE HAVE NOT CHARITY YE ARE NOTHING. We are told time and time again to be filled with Christ like love. AKA Charity. Pure charity never faileth. All things of the world at some point will fail. But the love of Christ, pure love... There is no end to it. It is an eternal concept.

Charity is the pure love of Christ. Christ is full of Charity; the perfect example of Christ’s charity toward us is when he gave his life on the cross. No one took Christ life from him; he gave it, so that he could overcome it, paving the way for each and every one of us to have eternal life. Great love than this? Than this man that gave his life for us? I think not. Think about someone you love dearly, who is special to you. Would you give your life for them? I know that there is one friend I would give my life to fallow and that is Jesus Christ. There is no life without Christ.

How do we become filled with this love for everyone???? Ask and ye shall receive. Then act. Put the asking to the pavement and go out there reach out and serve. There is no way to hate someone you are serving. I asked my mission president once how I could make better friendships with those around me, He told me "serve them"

It was asked of the Savior what the greatest command was. His response is to love.

"36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?

37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.

38 This is the first and great commandment.

39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself."

Matthew 22

In order to love others it has been made clear to me through this scripture that we must first love Christ, as we love Christ we will understand our divine potential, who we truly are, we will find new confidence in Christ. We are then told to love ourselves. In the godly way that he loves us. We will be more comfortable with who we are as our faith in Christ increases and our love for Him blooms we naturally have greater love for who we are and who we can become. 
Then we are expected to love others. But before this step we must first know Christ and love him.  To love anyone we must love Christ and who you are.

How do we show Christ we love Him?

There is a scripture for that :)

"17 And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."

Mosiah 2

It all comes back to showing simple acts of kindness. That which we do for others is done to God. That which we don't do for others also is not done for God.

When Christ came to earth He didn't come too ministered to. He came to minister. He came to lift the broken spirits, to heal the sick and to raise the dead in hopes that he would set an example for all of us. An example that we could choose to follow or choose to ignore.

His love for us is perfect. Our love for ourselves and others can be perfected through Him.

"16 Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

17 But whoso hath this world’s good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?"

1 John 3

"7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.

8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.

9 In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might alive through him.

10 Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.

18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

19 We love him, because he first loved us."

1 john 4

Fear and love like fear and faith cannot coexist.

My goal is to find greater love for my Savior, to serve Him in all ways that I possibly can. My goal is to give my heart to Christ.

"15 ¶If ye love me, keep my commandments."

"37 He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

38 And he that taketh not his across, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me.

39 He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it."

In all things God must come first. This is our time to take up His cross and follow Him to happiness. To lose your life in Christ is becoming found through the atonement. Lose yourself in Christ and find who you truly are, find who you are and love yourself in Christ, there is a world around us waiting to be given peace, not peace as the worlds gives it, peace that Christ gives us.

Through Christ comes perfect love, through Christ comes hope. Through Christ we are everything, without Christ we are nothing. We cannot do anything without the help of our Savior.

"32 For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? For sinners also love those that love them.

33 And if ye do good to them which do good to you, what thank have ye? For sinners also do even the same.

34 And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank have ye? For sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again.

35 But love ye your enemies, and do good, and blend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.

36 Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.

37 Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:"

Luke 6

"43 ¶Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

46 For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

47 And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?

48 Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect."

Matthew 5

No matter how hard it is we must love. ALL PEOPLE. Just as our father in heaven loves all of us. None of us our perfect, and from time to time we hurt others. It is crucial that we use the Atonement every day and repent of the times we use or hurt another, to let go of the pain caused by the past, to step into the future with a brightness of hope to let go of fear and to let love in.

"As I have loved you, love one another"

It is my goal to learn how to love this year, to let go of the past and to jump into a new future. To love myself through Christ and to love others as Christ does. It is a time to see the world through new eyes. To see the world as a place of hope. A place to grow and to learn to love ALL PEOPLE. 

It is a new year!!! LET US MAKE THE BEST OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!